It's been more than a year

Yups - I have to admit it was difficult to me to come to terms with his passing.

According to the Kubler-Ross model, there are 5 mental stage in which people deal with grief and tragedy, and they are :-

1) Denial
2) Anger
3) Bargaining
4) Depression
5) Acceptance

I don't know about you guys but I was constantly stuck in the 3rd and 4th loop, feeling depressed with what has happened but at the same time, saying that it was something that was totally outside my control. There have always been this slight regret that I am working overseas - if not I would've been there.

That was until my illness made a 180 degree flip on that school of thought -instead of being a curse, being here in Sheffield for the type of treatment that I'm having is just a true blessing.

It gave me a realisation that Allah has already made plans for us and we are just mere pawns in the greater master plan.

Allah has truly given me a second chance & I know I have to move on. I have to accept his passing and remind myself that one day, my turn will come. I will continuously remind myself that life on earth is only just a preparation for the hereafter.

It's been a while but i think I dreamt of him last night. Mak always said that if I do dream of arwah bapak, it's because I've not prayed enough for him lately.

So I will read the Quran for him tonight, insyallah.

One Year and 3 Days after..

Believe it or not, it has been a year since the passing of our father.

it has been a year since Burhan and Lan last seen him in flesh. It has been a year and more since Zul and I last seen him.

A lot has happened since then. Syukur alhamdulillah Regina about to masuk her first year by the end of this month. Syukur alhamdulillah Burhan had finished his Inverness attachment. Syukur alhamdulillah Along and family are doing well. Syukur alhamdulillah Dol is getting better and Kak Dila has just started life as a full fledge doctor again. Syukur alhamdulillah Cha dpt mara (and it's all thanks to Lan's persistency of calling and pursuing... might be exaggerating on the "all" part but you got what i mean right?) Syukur alhamdulillah Mak had managed to embark on a sole journey to UK (though Ita was there with her... but Mak took care of everything herself withour relying on anyone the whole way) 

Unfortunately, nothing in the world is peachy and bright. A few deaths in our extended family follow as well. Arwah Mak Wang passed away a few months shortly after arwah bapak. To be more accurate November 30th, if I'm not mistaken. And just recently our great grandmother Arwah Tok Esah.

You would think that amongst the three, bapak would've surpassed them mortality-wise. But i guess it just shows how mysterious God's way and how it can take an unexpected turns as well in this path we call life.

Anyway, this is just as a filler as well as a reminder. Nothing much to write. Hope you guys will read this. 

p/s: btw, i read randomly that during the CNY festival, there was a fire breakout at Lorong Hj Sairan Sabtu. Mak Long's place alright ker?

Lotsa Luv,

Aishah